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How do you EVER get kids to obey without threatening?!”

 

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All fed-up with trying to get her kids to behave, she let herself fall on the couch; frustrated and helpless; then she turned towards me and said, “How do you EVER get kids to do things without threatening them?!”

I know how she felt; and how every loving parent feels when we have to resort to use pressure for simple every-day tasks. Enforcing discipline and following the daily-routine makes the home a battle ground - it is traumatizing for the kids and the parents!

Although strickness and smacking (that does not cause injury) is one of the methods of discipline, its effectiveness decreases when overdone and thus, should only be used when the issue is serious (like obligatory prayers.) and the child is likely to benefit and learn the lesson – or else, it backfires and makes kids act out worse; rather than better.

…and the most distressing thing is the guilt which stays with you throughout the day.

So, this (adapted) reply (below) by a parenting expert Dr. Laura, gives some pretty practical tips to help you keep calm and take control of the situations when you need not use force.

Though these tips seem overwhelming at first and a daunting task for you as the parent – I’d say it’s worth the effort because kids need compassion and love in order to grow emotionally healthy, and as shepherds; it’s our duty to exert every effort as much as we can to give them the balanced environment they need.

- Shawana A. Aziz

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For New Moms: Practical Tips for Cloth Diapering!

For New Moms,

Practical Tips for Cloth Diapering!

A few days back, during a discussion with a friend (who also runs a playschool) about what’s the right-age to potty-train kids, she said, “It depends upon a number of factors; how busy you are, how much pollution you are willing to make, and how much you are willing to spend on poop ( :/ ) ; …otherwise, as my mom says, you can let the kid wear them until the marriage-age, because then it will be really embarrassing if your kid is still in diapers!”
I bursted into a big laughter at that last statement, but the pollution thing got my head spinning for days!

“the earlier you train the kids to use the toilet, the earlier they get independant. I train kids in just 3 days!” she added.

I was ever-so convinced to let go the disposable diapers, but was really not up to the challenge of dealing with wet floors, smelly pants, and rushing to the washroom every time the baby makes “IT’s HAPPENING NOW Face!”

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Incidently, a week later, the school teacher assigned the topic of ‘Garbage Disposal and Twin-bin System’ for my son’s next test, and talking to him about all the environmental harms of greenhouse gases, got me thinking about how much landfill I must have jammed up after 3 kids (?) with every child needing 6,500–10,000 diapers before potty training around 30 months old (!) – and it is estimated that most diapers need about 250-500 years to decompose (!)

Now I have to do something!

“It has to stop!” I said to myself after reading the potential health risks of disposable diapers to the baby.

…and then alhamdulillah today, this article popped up from somewhere; and it makes cloth diapers look not so bad as a susbstitute! Very well written with practical tips! A must read for new mothers.

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